Monday, January 19, 2015

The in between.

We enjoyed the holidays while planning and managing all the little details that go into moving your entire family 3,000 miles away. But as soon as the last Christmas carol was sung, the last gift was given, it was all business for us in the moving department. I  have to say, I think we did a pretty good job juggling all those things at once. Perhaps I shouldn't pat ourselves on the back *too* much, but, hell, it's a busy time to move, just saying.

On December 26th the tree came down and the moving boxes came out. We purged, threw more away more than I could even begin to explain, sold a ton, and gave away a whole heck of a lot. I don't even think I'm the hoarding type, but my gosh, we accumulated a lot in the last 7 years of living there. I realized through the process that I'm not really attached to 'stuff' at all, and can easily say bye to things--while my husband is totally, completely the sentimental type. Not shocking for anyone who knows us. Needless to say, we had to compromise here and there. Did you know moving is very straining on a marriage? I'm sure you do. Needless to say, I'm certain we will power through. We actually still like each other a little, so it's all good ;) We still have to unpack in San Diego, though. 

However, it's now January 18th and the home we made a family in is empty. 

Everything we are taking to re-set up our lives and home across the country is shipping in two, tiny 8'x5'x7' boxes.


I get a lot of gasp, shock reactions with that picture. I know it's hard to imagine pairing down so much, but it was truly very freeing to simply to that degree. What we need is coming with us. What we don't is not. We are also totally buying a new couch in California.

I had posted some photos to instagram, you know, the sappy "my house is empty-we're moving" pics. They seem to really gut-punch us memory-keepers. Like the stuff somehow defines a home--and honestly, it kinda does to a point. The way we set up our sacred spaces becomes a part of us.


But this entire time I've held onto the fact that these people, all of them right up there? Yea, they are my home. When Declan and I were dating there was a song by a piano player we liked and it said "You are home to me"--and we'd write that on our cards to each other and all this sappy nonsense. 

But you guys-I'm not sure I fully understood that until I had a family. It's the truth of how I feel at this very moment. I can't tell you how I'll feel in a month, heck, 6 months, etc. Right now, though? I feel like if I have my people, my little family, I am home. Holding onto that fact has kept me from feeling too much sadness about leaving our townhome, comfort of family close by, and starting completely over. 



The house may be empty but the memories certainly aren't. So much life was lived in that place and besides all those steps, I'll mostly think back on that townhouse and smile. 

***

So many people have asked, so what now? 

The weird in-between time. Ah, yes. That's exactly where we are at.

Our stuff has left before us. Our place is empty. We are crashing at my childhood home, the dog included (yes, he's coming!) for the next 10 days. Our one-way flight to San Diego is January 29th and then the other part of this crazy adventure begins when we get on the West Coast. 

I never expected to become an expert (ok, not quiiiite) in cross-country moves by the age of 29, but, it's amazing what can happen when you just put one foot in front of the other and say: We're terrified, but we're doing it anyway. 

After this little in-between time, we are up, up and away. Keep us in your thoughts :)


Friday, December 19, 2014

happy twinkly lights and all.

It's totally hard for me to believe that Christmas is less than a week away. I admit I've not been focusing on the season, hardly at all. I'm letting the busyness of everything going on shroud all the good and fun stuff about the holiday.

But I'm not being busy baking cookies, shopping for gifts, wrapping (haven't started), or doing fun stuff like that, though-I'm just totally and completely in a different mindset this year. It's all focused on the move, and details (oh the details!), and packing, and selling half our crap, and booking flights, and this rental car, and packing--yea, packing.  Every time I walk to the car, I'm freezing. I can't help but think, "so soon--so soon we won't need heavy winter coats". A perk that I can't deny will be, well, absolutely wonderful, and bound to save me about 5-10 minutes of 'getting out the door' time in the mornings.

I'm hopeful, anyway.

But I need to force myself to stay present, to stay here in my brain a little longer, for the kids. Christmas is supposed to fun and magical and I want it to be that for them. I really do.

So Christmas cookies and gingerbread houses and all that messy, fun stuff this weekend. Oh, and going to see that house with all the crazy twinkly lights set to Frozen music, whose electric bill must be more than my mortgage each month. We're doing it all, baby, with our cheesy faces on.


Since this is likely the last time I'll write before Christmas (it's oh so rare these days as you see)--I really do hope and pray this holiday season is filled with little nuggets of goodness amidst the chaos and craziness. Ones that you can hold onto and remember and look back and smile about.

My hope is to write a lot more when we move, to keep everyone up to date on our adventures and all. But, let's be honest--I don't want to make promises I can't keep. I have good intentions at least. Until then, you can find me on instagram, where you can catch a snippet here and there of our wildly awesome (ha) days.

Merry Christmas, friends.

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Adventure awaits

Over the last few months some big thoughts and decisions, processing and praying have been going on over here. Probably some of the biggest in our life. It's been hard not to talk about it, not to write about it, not to be able to process it with many people. It's actually a decision my little family has been bouncing around in our heads for two years now.

Two years in the making. Waiting. Praying. Thinking it was probably just a far shot, and it's just too hard to reach. Too scary, actually, for so many reasons.

But a few months ago we decided to just step one foot in front of the other, promising ourselves that if God continued to open each door, we'd walk through it. If it was made obvious to us to stop, we'd stop. Step after step, though, the doors continued to open. We walked forward and had an eerie peace about it. It felt like God was laying this out, like it was the right and next step for our little fam.

It's finally to a sure enough place where I can share that we are moving from coast to coast. Yep--we are going to San Diego.



I am a mix of super, crazy excited for new beginnings, terrified of the unknown, completely overwhelmed with details, and beyond thrilled for some sunshine and a different lifestyle. And how the heck am I supposed to pack a house we've lived in for 6+ years??

Declan's job is now completely remote. He's been working from his basement office for the last few weeks and it's going great. He's so disciplined and works really well on his own/ from an 'at home' environment. My job is also remote. I can work from anywhere that has a laptop and internet. Our kids are young enough to not completely hate us for dragging them away from their friends and such. They're resilient and adaptable at the ages of 2 & 4. It's a time in our life where we're not tied down to an area based on our careers, and that is so freeing, so very rare, and something we just can't take for granted.

We will miss family like crazy, we will miss friends, but we know that this is our time to do it.

It's time to make that little spark of a dream into a reality.

We'll see you in February, sunny San Diego.


(via)

Thursday, November 27, 2014

a lesson in gratitude

Yesterday, my friend Leah, talented photographer and beautiful momma to four posted a link on facebook to this blog post by Wildflowers Photography. I don't click on everything on facebook---let's be honest, there's just not time, but if I get that little inkling that it may speak to you, katie, I click.

I clicked on that link and I read. I read, and I read and I felt convicted in that gentle, loving way that I am letting time pass me by.

This clincher statement:
"So, with that, friends, I urge you to take notice. Notice when life is passing you by and fight to stay present. Fight against fear when it tells you that there isn’t anything worth remembering. Because those days become years; and, before you know it, you’ve missed it. Don’t miss it. Start documenting life in your own home. Don’t worry if there is still laundry on the floor from last week. Soon your babies will outgrow those clothes, and your hands won’t be as full, and when you look back at that photograph you took so many years ago, with little muddy shirts and pants on the floor, you will feel a longing just at the sight of it."

Fight to stay present. How guilty am I of this? 

I stopped documenting little moments because they didn't seem photography-worthy. The house is dark because of the cloudy day and the snow was falling outside. It's certainly not an ideal environment to drag out my camera. Besides, the house is a wreck, the kids have been into everything, I was in the middle of cooking dinner, in fact. They'd crafted beaded necklaces half the day, drawn on the table with sharpie (cough, Lu), whined about who hit who so many times I lost count. 

It doesn't matter though. It doesn't matter that I had to hike my ISO up so high that the images are grainy. It doesn't matter because I have them now.  
















I couldn't care less that this is blurry--because look at lucy's little face.







In those few moments of taking photos I started to feel the gratitude pour over my mind and heart. It doesn't matter why I can't figure out for the life of me why Lucy never wants pants on. It doesn't matter that there are crafts strewn my floor on a daily basis, and that tiny fingerprints litter my refrigerator. It doesn't matter that Mac creases the back of my couch cushions because it just so happens to be his favorite place to rest. 

Better yet--it does matter. Because these moments are worth remembering.

Happy Thanksgiving, friends. May gratitude pour over your heart today and every day.


Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Some catching up + Fall Pics + Lucy-girl likes to paint

I'm just gonna start writing and updating and not really bother with anything sounding pretty. So let's do it, ok?

The last month or so I've been dealing with some knee issues that have really held me back from my normal workouts. It's not a huge deal, so I'm not going to make it seem like one. But the ortho suggested I go to PT and I wanted to laugh--because, PT? Come onnnn. But yesterday I went and as it turns out my knee issue is really a hip issue, so we'll be focusing on getting my hips stronger. After one session my hips are feeling it. We did some really great exercises to help me work on balance and stability so I stop putting undo pressure and wobbling around on my knees like a fool. Let's hope it works.

While I'm on a month break from my fun, hardcore stuff (like bootcamp, tabata workouts, HIIT cycling, body pump, etc)--I'm now all into yoga (like body flow) and pilates, because I have no choice basically. The funny thing is, I am actually starting to enjoy it, when I truly thought that was not possible. Who knew.

+  +  +

In case you haven't noticed, it's Fall. Fall means family pictures....or something like that. I happen to have a talented photographer in my family. My sister-in-law Lyryn does my family and I do hers. It's a swap deal and it works out. This year I did her birth pics and video since she just had that sweet baby boy. Just 3 weeks after having a baby she insisted to take our family pictures and I'm so happy with what she got.






I was going to make some excuse as to why I had no desire to send Christmas cards this year---but after seeing these pictures how can I not? It would be a sin.

+  +  +

Both my girls are just flourishing this year. I know that's kind of a stupid, fancy word to use--but they really are. Lucy is doing the 2's preschool program so she goes for 2 days a week (only 2 hours) and she loves it. She's coming home and singing songs that I remember Em singing at her age. 

During their free time the kids can paint at the easel and Lucy is OBSESSED with painting. I have about 400 paintings of nothing that I have no clue what to do with. They also are so overly painted that they take a week to dry. You know what I mean

The following conversation happened before preschool:

Lucy: I go'ning to paint today!

Me: Ohhh, fun. But how about you play play doh instead? (just a little, ahem, encouragement)

Lucy: (in her mad voice) NO MOM. I GO'NING TO PAINT TODAY.

Fast forward a few hours to preschool pickup.

SHE WAS NOT JOKING. Normally I arrive to one, maybe two sloppy-wet-drippy paintings to take home.

THERE WERE FIVE.  F I V E.

The teachers were like, "Lucy was painting at a furious pace today"--and I'm like, uh huh. She was just proving a point to me. 

Honestly, this kid is a trip--and I will never gently direct her away from painting ever, ever again. Lesson learned.

+  +  +

How are you beautiful people? Is anyone still out there? ......does blogging still exist? ;)

Friday, October 3, 2014

Why Hellllooooo there Mr. Wyatt

The first moments with your new baby---well, they're incredible. No matter how you labor, no matter how you birth, each one is just so special. Each time a new baby comes into the world it's pure magic and I don't know how else to say it without sounding like a complete loon. But it's magic.

My sister-in-law Lyryn really wanted a birth-day video when her 3rd little guy was born after seeing me do one for my sister when Deacon arrived. Thanks to a scheduled c-section and a little schedule-adjusting with my husband, I was able to make it work for me to attend.

We had no idea if they'd let me into the operating room until that morning, when the anesthesiologist on-duty had to make that call. But thanks to a little favor from God (I'm certain...Lyryn had been praying lots after all...), she was totally cool with allowing me in to capture some of those usually-unseen moments.

I got to suit up like a marshmallow man. It was amazing. Also, those suits are not breathable, and I may or may not have had pit-stains on my shirt. But it was well worth it.

While my main goal was to get video clips to mash-up into a little video keepsake for them, I managed to sneak in a few photos here and there. Not much, but some. And Wyatt James at 7lbs 10oz is one hunk of a little baby man, with a pouty lip that will certainly get him anything he wants for the rest of his life. He shares a birthday with his Api, Declan & Lyryn's dad (who passed away last year), who would have been 70 yesterday.

Basically, we're all in love.




And if you managed to not see this yet, between facebook and instagram, here's the video. My goal with this was to tell a little story of that morning Wyatt was born. To give you the feel of the day, the excitement, the nerves, and to really just remind us all that every birth is perfect and beautiful in it's own way.

Because, squishy, beautiful baby at the end. The ultimate prize, am I right?

Wyatt James from MeMo Lifestyle Videography on Vimeo.

Hope you have a happy weekend, my friends.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Two pictures in sunny San Diego

This past weekend I got the chance to visit my little brother in San Diego allllll byyyyy myselfffffff. Yes, that must be exaggerated. Because, a trip alone to the grocery store is a treat when you're a mom--so four days in Southern California?

Bliss!

I've visited there before with my whole crew (and mom and dad) in tow. We did more the touristy thing that time. This time, I wanted to just do what my brother does. I wanted to eat at some of the yummiest places, I wanted to hike, I wanted to go dunk myself in the ocean because it's both scary and exhilarating all at once. I wanted to just spend time with Wit and enjoy being brother/sister and not me being mom-distracted-by-two-kids and him being uncle-getting-climbed-on. 

Life has changed so much for us both over the last half a decade (and more), and honestly? I'll kinda treasure the time spent with him. Bunking with him and his 2 other roommates for a few days, staying up wayyyy past my bedtime, meeting more people than I'd imagined, attending parties, going to his church with him, and really getting a feel for his life there. It was really good.

Can you believe that I had no little rascals tugging at my leg the entire time, and I lugged my big camera across the country, to one of the most beautiful areas of the country nonetheless, and I only took two pictures

I have no excuse. None at all, really.




But thanks, iPhone:


You wanna know the best part? Knowing that I didn't have to worry about the homefront. That my super capable husband was home, holding down the fort. He not only managed to work from home some days, but he did some boss pony-tails on our girls (come on...learning how to do hair is hard!), dressed them pretty darn cute and took them on more outings than I even do alone.

They didn't really miss me a bit. And thanks to facetime I didn't really have a chance to miss them much either. I was greeted at the airport with some beautiful flowers, my crazy-cute family, and I came home to a super clean house. 

I mean, what more could a girl ask?

You'll see me back again, San Diego.


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