Today has been another very emotional day. I am drained, and I am tired. I really have no desire to do much right now, other then cry. I know that sounds just so pathetic, and I hate that. I'm usually the "let's stay strong" or at least look it. I just can't hide it right now. That friendship from the past is over, and its very hard when you tried to recover it and were denied. It not only makes you feel but a fool, but a failure. So, I'm being honest today-I feel like crap. I am pretty miserable. Although I know other things in my life are so great, it feels like someone has died. I am going through that grieving, and it hurts a lot.
I hope it gets better. The feelings...not the relationship. We all know that won't get better, or at least not for a million years. See? I'm pathetic today. Not my normal, strong, self.
My mother has assured me that my feelings are normal, that losing a friendship is almost like grieving over a death. It's nice to know I'm not that crazy...unless, it just runs in the family.