Wednesday, May 5, 2010

The waitress.

Last night we decided to take a trip out to our favorite dinner place e.v.e.r. It's an up-scale Mexican restaurant (and you know how much I love my Mexican food). You know...we're getting down to the wire here--and wanted to make sure we got in one last date to our 'place'.

We love this place for so many reasons.

It was a place we'd take dates when we were both in college. It is, in fact-in and around our college towns. It brings back a TON of memories.

We go there when times get tough as a place to un-wind. We go there to celebrate good things. It's kind of like our "happy place".

We always have the best talks and trips down memory lane there. Oh, and bonus: The food is EXCELLENT.

But, last night. It just went all wrong.

When we got there, I was already too.starving.for.words--heck, we both were. It was already after 7:30pm, and that's on the late side for us to eat dinner. Especially considering *ahem* the pregnant one over here. Yea. Me.

So we sit down and we wait for our server.

We wait....

...and wait....

....and wait some more.

Stomachs grumbling. A look of annoyance already plastered on my face.

At least 15-20 minutes goes by--and! Whatthefreak?

Finally our waitress comes, and mutters something to the effect of, "Oh, sorry about the wait". I secretly want to say, "Yea, I bet you are" (see? being this pregnant and hungry is a lethal combination).

We clearly have our menus closed because DUH! We had 20 minutes to look already! Plus, we come here often! We don't even need to crack them open!

....and DUH. I'm STARVING. I'm VERY pregnant. CAN YOU SEE THIS BELLY? Helloooo?

But does she ask to take our dinner order? No.

Instead she throws us some garbage-line about the drink that Declan wanted, and how it was on "backorder" from the beer company. Umm...for reals?? Did she really just say that??

I insistantly say something to the effect of, "Could we just put in our order, we're really hungry."

She takes our order.

She comes back with our drinks and our chips. Literally, my stomach was making noises. THAT.HUNGRY.PEOPLE. [I'm growing a human! Give me a break!]
But guess what? Instead of giving us our drinks and chips which we clearly waited forever for--she keeps them ON the tray, ON her shoulder, while telling the table across from us ALL OF THE DESSERT SPECIALS (which was 2930843 lines long!) For the love of God!

When she finally delivers them....miraculously the beer hubs ordered was not on backorder anymore. Interesting. "Oh, somehow I have been mixing the two up--and have been for the last 6 years"...was her explanation. WTH? 6 years?? Oy ve.

Obviously, very hungry-we pretty much scarf up our chips and salsa (which were in smaller then usual containers....I swear...someone was out to get us).

She literally walked by about 29430823 times, and SERIOUSLY (I swear, swear, swear!) she would turn her head so she didn't have to acknowledge us. EVER. Never refilled our chips. Never even allowed us to get her attention! Not once!

I must have muttered to Declan about 3 or 4 times, "She hates us!" Because clearly, she did.

Our meals took FOREVER to come out, which, isn't necessarily her fault. She delivered everything to our table with attitude, and complete rudeness.

After our meals came out, I looked directly at her and said, "Could I have a refill on my tea when you get a chance?"....

and I KID YOU NOT---she whipped her head around and IGNORED ME! TOTALLY!

Declan and I just looked at each other and burst out laughing. Laughing is all we could do.

Clearly, we had the worst waitress everrrr. And? She obviously hated us.

It was one thing after another. Mainly, the fact that she basically IGNORED us the entire time, which can be so frustrating when you're paying for a nice meal. My potential LAST meal out with my husband, WITHOUT a baby. Just US.

You know what? Declan and I have both waited tables. We totally understand every aspect of waiting tables, and often times feel bad for servers because it can be stressful and some customers can be crappy-crap-heads. There was just no excuse for how she treated us. Although Declan and I are classic for finding the good in situations and making things still ruined dinner. I mean, her lack-of-service was all we could talk about, or heck, laugh about. That's annoying.

We eat out often...(too often, and that is something we're consciously working on. I suck at cooking ya'll!), so I see lots and lots and lots of servers.

None were as bad as her. Ever.

Declan and I both felt sick to our stomach tipping her the normal 20%...we have NEVER tipped less then that. EVER. But we knew it wasn't right. She seriously neglected our table, and when she finally would make her way over-she was rude.

So for the first time ever we tipped less then 20%, and I wrote a tiny little note on her receipt that said, "Please pay attention to your tables."

I'm not gonna lie--we sat there on our iPhones giggling and googling "how do you tip a bad waitress?", and laughing at the responses [heck, we had the TIME, it took forever to get our check too!].

Although we've never tipped less then our norm--we actually didn't feel bad about what did because she legitimately sucked. Big time.

We left and rewarded ourselves with Dairy Queen for dessert. Afterall, we were not about to spend another dime there (or another two hours!).


What would you have done? I'm curious. I tried to be kind on the check and leave a little explanation. We contemplated (okay, we JOKED) about writing something more harsh, yet funny--"You failed!", "You suck at life!" (kidding, we would neverrrr do that). Have you ever had to tip a waitress less for legitimate reasons? Do tell.

Happy Cinco de Mayo!


  1. I'd do the same thing! We had horrible service on Friday night and you should have heard me complaining - I was on a roll. I think being pregnant we notice this stuff more too (because we're typically very hungry). :)

  2. oooh, i HATE lazy waiters/waitresses. i'm in the same boat, i've done the job before so i know there's a lot of stuff you can't control...but on the flip side, i also know there's ways around that...mostly by BEING NICE!!! ugh.

    i had a waitress LEAVE THE RESTAURANT during a birthday dinner for me...she just pawned us off on another waiter. so we asked the manager to make sure whatever tip we left would go to the person who took over, NOT mrs. abandonment.

  3. I worked in food service for a long time in HS and college so I am anal about my servers too. I hate when servers do what you just described. I would def tip less than 20% too. A note is always a good idea too, just not one that is way over the top rude.

    I got a super rude note and no tip one time in college and I was having the worst day!!! Turns out me and another server got the table confused and we each thought the other had it so the poor people got like 0 service but the note was SOOO rude, I cried in the bathroom!

  4. I would do the same thing, for sure! Hubby is a great tipper, but when it comes to really bad service, it just kills me. I too was a waitress, so I know what it feels like. However; there is no reason to treat your customers that badly! Sorry you had such crappy service for your "last supper" :-)

  5. Honestly? Small tip, no note. I think the small tip gets your point across. But that's just me, and I'm a huge chicken. My hubby would probably think I was the coolest chick ever if I did what you did.

  6. Oh my goodness that is so annoying. I found myself getting frustrated just reading your post. Ha! I would have done the same thing and maybe gone and talked to the manager on the way out. That's what I normally do, I ask to speak to the manager without making a huge scene, but they need to know what is going on. That is crazy ridiculous. My husband gets mad when I get impatient (he is super polite), but it's hard not to especially waiting for as long as you did. That's not right.

  7. Dude that SUCKS. I hate when the servers are lazy/bad.

    The only thing I can think that would make her so bad is if maybe she recently had a mc or is going through if and saw your belly and it upset her? Still not really an excuse since it's her job...

    Did you say anything to the manager?

  8. I would have tipped less too, but definitely made sure to write a note. Especially since we're young, I think sometimes people just assume that we're bad tippers instead of that the tip reflected the service.

    Something similar happened to us recently when we were out with my parents. No refills the entire time, we'd try to flag her down for something and she'd ignore us, etc. An hour after we finished, we were still waiting for the check. My dad kept telling the waitress that we needed to leave and could she please bring the check. It still took her another 45 MINUTES to bring us the check. When we did receive it, he wrote 'The tip would have been better if the service was.' Maybe that's a little brutal, but it's the truth!

  9. We once went to a restaurant that had 3 waiters on staff and literally, 2 tables of customers. We got 0 service. There was no excuse for them to be negligent, they weren't busy at all. At one point, we'd been waiting for a refil on our water, and the waiter was standing at the drink station so my husband got up with our glasses and walked over to the waiter and asked if we could get a refil. The guy said, ya, you can fill up over there. SERIOUSLY?! This was a nice restaurant where you do not serve your own drinks. We left him a penny for a tip and didn't feel bad about it at all. I understand how fast the food comes out is not the servers fault, but completely ingoring your table, we dock major dollars from a tip for ignoring us. We usually tip 30% for good service so if we go to a restaurant a lot, we try to request cetain servers that we know take good care of us :)

  10. Haha! Oh my...this is so sad AND so funny. I think you guys handled it with complete class. Good job! And the note you left was perfect.

    I once had a server in Reno actually tell me that the reason my food was bad was because it was the end of the day and all the food was being cooked in the leftover fry grease. WHAAAA!?!?!?! Did he really just say that to me??? I only left a 10% tip and felt HORRIBLE.

  11. I think that you two handled this perfectly, who knows why she was so crappy that day, but you nicely let her know your complaint. Sorry your "potential" last meal as the two of you was not as you hoped. Happy Cinco de Mayo!

  12. Oh my.

    I'm having a small panic attack wondering if you ever blogged about my service since I waited on your family HOW many times a week??


    Shitty service sucks.

  13. I've waited tables on and off for the last ten years, and so I have a lot of experience as a server, and very strong opinions on it.

    And. I wouldn't have tipped your chick at all.

    Don't get me wrong. I HATED when people stiffed me. But then, I'm really fabulous server. I'm a perfectionist, and take pride in doing a good job, despite the fact that I was shlepping spaghetti.

    Waiting tables is really, really hard work. But only if you actually do a good job. If you don't go a good job, then I don't think you should get paid.

    So I think you guys were way nicer than I would have been. And that's coming from a server. :)

  14. I don't think I would leave a rude note, as Heather said, it might just be a misunderstanding or whatever.. However, I would probably leave less tip. Is 20% normal in the US?? That's a lot!! I'm used to 10%!!

  15. I ALWAYS leave 20% - I feel it's only fair to them for dealing with the crapheads who don't leave anything or screw them over on tips. But if a waitress/waiter is bad enough...i only tip them .50 cents. That way they know I didn't accidentally forget to tip them. They can look @ the .50 cents and know how displeased I was with them. A little harsh, but if they are at least polite and kinda attempt to get my order right...they'd get 20%.

  16. I waited tables too, so I agree! There are crappy people and it does get busy, but a tip is earned not part of your pay. You need to work hard for every table, no matter how hectic things get. You did the right thing by tipping less!!

  17. I waited tables too, so I agree! There are crappy people and it does get busy, but a tip is earned not part of your pay. You need to work hard for every table, no matter how hectic things get. You did the right thing by tipping less!!

  18. I think what you did was perfect. You should not be obligated to tip her the normal amount if she sucks. Plus, leaving the little note will let her know that you were unhappy with the service and that way she can't just brush it off and think you are cheapos or something

  19. I would have had a manager out to the table before the check was ever a question. That type of service is inexcusable, but I feel that under-tipping doesn't make the server think about what they did wrong. They'll just think I'm cheap (which doesn't necessarily bother me), but if I plan on coming back to the place, I want the service to improve. The only way for that to happen is to tell a manager why I was unhappy with my service.

  20. Wow, I waited tables too, and there's just no excuse for that!

  21. At least you made light of the situationa and laughed it frustrating!

    I definitely would not feel bad for tipping her less...she didn't do her JOB!

  22. The last time that happened, I just got up and left. I talked to the manager, and was comped' a free meal for next time! I felt bad, but I was not about to wait while my waitress was being rude!

    You were nicer then I would be.. and you're pregnant! That gives you room right there!:)

    I'm heading for some mexican food aroudn 1! Can't wait! :)yumm!

  23. I am anal enough I probably would have asked to speak to manager about it. I know that my husband would have left $0 as a tip. He is an awesome tipper, but I think he always wants you to work for it. That stinks about your experience. Maybe you guys need to try one more time for a date night before baby.

  24. I waited tables all through high school and college so my heart really goes out to those folks busting butt to provide good service. It's not easy...espcailly if you are having a bad day like a previous commenter mentioned. For good service, I always tip 25%. Average service is 20% and bad service is 15%.

    HOWEVER, I had an experience at a super-upscale restaurant once where the waiter was too concerned with flirting with his girlfriend who was sitting at the bar. The girlfriend actually gave us mean looks when her boyfriend would come to our table of 4 girls.

    So I wrote a note and only left 10%. I had to leave SOMETHING but the note was awesome without beging overly rude.

    So I think you did the right thing!!! Good for you!!!

  25. HAHAH! I love this story... Not because the waitress was rude, but because that's the story of my life! I swear I have a tattoo on my forehead that says, BE RUDE TO ME, I LIKE IT! blerg!

    You have way more patience than I do :-)

  26. Ooh, I would not have felt bad at all about leaving a smaller tip! My hubby would probably have left her nothing, but I just can never bring myself to do that!

    When I first started waitressing a few years ago, I was swamped with a big party and had a hard time getting back to my smaller table. They stiffed me and left an incredibly rude note. I was so upset, I wanted to run after them and apologize. I was holding back tears for the rest of the night! Haha, it was awful.

  27. I would have ordered Quac and thrown it in her face. The End.

  28. Wow, you were SO much nicer than I was! It would have been more than a note- I would have called over her manager. She needs a swift kick in the pants as a reminder to pay attention to her tables.

  29. After having lived in Europe where you don't have to tip and after having waited tables myself, I firmly believe that a tip is earned and if your service sucked that bad (especially at an upscale restaurant) then you did the right thing. How frustrating!

  30. Oh, I can't stand when I get crappy service at a restaurant. You're right-- it completely ruins the meal! I have definitely tipped less on several occasions when it was truly warranted. If I had a server who blatantly ignored me like yours, I would definitely be tempted to contact the manager too.

  31. I would have asked to speak with the manager once the meal arrived. (I would be scared the cook/waitress would spit in the food if I spoke up any sooner.) And I definitely would not have tipped the usual 20% based on what you experienced.

  32. I would have left a note and spoken to the manager. go out to eat to enjoy yourself not be ignored and treated poorly. And I was a waitress for a long time so I know how hard it can be, but nothing excuses her from being polite to everyone.

    I hope you have a very blessed evening! XO

  33. In reality, I'd have handled it how you did.

    But I would have wanted to kick her. Or at least tell her off.

    If I was with you, I might have, in her defense.

    Who treats a pregnant woman like???

    Ugh! Now I'm mad for you!

  34. I definitely would have left a lame tip AND would have told the manager. That is so rude and there is no excuse! I waitressed all through high school and college and never did that. If I did have a table that waited longer than they should have, I made sure to do something for them-free appetizer or desert.

    That is so rude! It's not too late to call the restaurant!

  35. I'm surprised she had been there 6 years if she acted like that often! She didn't deserve a good tip with that service. There are times that things are out of servers control, but this was obviously not one of those times!

  36. I think I probably would have got the manager after she ignored you when you asked for a refill. I would have definitely left less than 20%.

  37. Seriously, this girl needs to find another job. Waitressing is NOT her calling. Wrong…Just wrong!! I would have done the same thing!!!

  38. You are more generous than I would have been ... I would have not even given her a tip!!

  39. Awwww that's so stinky!!! I would have done the same thing that you did. I love that you guys googled about how to tip a bad waitress!!!

    I have never waited tables - but I know that their jobs are hard and I really try my best to be super nice to servers (and bussers, and the hostess) - but that service was nuts!!

    Last night I went out with my brothers and boyfriend for Cinco De Mayo - the place we went the service was so bad we just left. It was 15 minutes, they hadn't come to our table once (one person had to stand the whole time because there weren't enough chairs), and it was SO hot in there. It wasn't even that busy! So we felt bad but decided to go somewhere else. I've never done that before. Eek.

    Sorry for the long comment. Hope you're having a wonderful day!

  40. LOL! "You failed!"

    That's really lousy. Sorry you guys had a rough time there. Rude/ignorant waitresses are the worst. I'm a pretty quiet person all around...I would've probably complained to Jarrod a lot like you and Declan talked and laughed (and Googled), but I would've left a really lousy tip and been done there.

    But I don't blame you for your helpful note and less than normal tip...sounds like she needed a kick.