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Friday, June 11, 2010

Cheers to Motherhood

I'm not the one who likes to post on controversial topics on the blog. Honestly, I'd just really rather not go there. I do just wish we could all get along, and that...that's what's on my mind today, to be frank.

I've now joined this club called "Motherhood". I have only a tiny perspective of it, it's true. I've not been a part of it for long. Heck, a month. But, I have noticed a few things I'd like to point out.

Why are so many mom's against other mom's?

Why are there so many 'controversial' debates over how to parent your children?

I could literally name 5 hot-topics off the top of my head that cause quite a stir among moms or moms-to-be.

1. going 'natural' vs. using medication, or home-births vs. hospital births/birthing centers

2. breastfeeding vs. formula feeding (including how long to do any and either)

3. whether to co-sleep, use a bassinet, or just use the crib right from the get-go

4. immunizations vs. no immunizations

5. being a stay at home mom vs. working mom

...and there are like TONS more. Tons. That list doesn't even scratch the surface.

But, my question is.....WHY?

Why do we let these so called 'controversial' topics divide us?

Why do we have heated debates over them?

Why do we waste our breath?

Why do we build up walls against each other because of differing opinions?

Because honestly...aren't we all* in this for our kids?

To do the best for them...to see them thrive, and grow and learn?

Because in the end, we're all mothers.

Part of the same club. Doing what works for us, what works for our kids, what seems right to us. We know our own children best.

Mommy's....we're part of the same team.

Let's remember that.

Cheers to Motherhood.

~*~

*Let's face it, if you watch the news you know there are some loser mom's out there, who are NOT doing the best for their children, and who, honestly? Should have never had the right to have children. They make stupid, selfish, often LAZY decisions that directly hurt their children. These aren't the "mothers" that I'm referring to in this post. If you catch my drift.

19 comments:

  1. What a beautiful post. You make a great point. I am not a mom yet but hope when I am I will remember this!

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  2. I know EXACTLY what you mean!! I get soooo tired of hearing/reading all the debates about all these issues. I've given up trying to keep peace because it's just never going to happen. I do what I feel is best for my children and myself and that's the right choice for us. Even if you do something different I respect that and know that you are doing what works best for you. Birth is a miracle no matter where or how it happens! :)

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  3. I completely agree! To each his own, right? I mean, what works for you may not work for me and vise versa... I think it's crazy when some moms think their way is the only way that works or the only way that is right. Drives me crazy! Who cares how you do everything, as long as it works for you and your family!

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  4. your post just made me think of 7th heaven (no offense) when annie was talking about how all the moms should stop judging each other and come together and collaborate. the stay at home moms could help the working moms out with after school care and working moms could use their business skills to teach the stay at home moms. anyways, i'm not a mom, but it seems like everyone always knows the best thing to do (with their kids or otherwise) and not everyone is the same.

    good post, katie.

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  5. I am right there with you! It even shocked me
    how negative some of the nurses even were at the hospital about us being excited that shed slept so well!

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  6. I am right there with you! It even shocked me
    how negative some of the nurses even were at the hospital about us being excited that shed slept so well!

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  7. I totally agree! Why should we compete with each other? We are all working toward the same goal..raising our children. (I have only been a mom for two days..but that is my two sense).

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  8. I hear ya girl!!! We should support each other b/c we already put enough of "mom guilt" on ourselves :D So I am with ya..Cheers to Motherhood!!!!

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  9. That is such a good point! We all need to remember that we know what is best for our babies and it doesn't need to be any more complicated than that

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  10. I am with you . . everyone has the right to parent the way they want . . the way that best fits their lifestyle . . the best that works for them . . who are we to judge what works best for them because what works best for me sure wont work best for you!

    cheers to motherhood and supporting eachother!

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  11. I was literally thinking about this today. I can't even post certain things on Twitter and still feel guilt about things that weren't even MY CHOICE from when L was an infant, solely because of opinions of other moms. (You know one of those topics!) I don't know if it's worse when it's an IRL friend or a stranger attacking, but I don't get it. I am a big advocate for getting rid of the binky by a decent age, but even though I know the speech/language/dentition issues that it causes, I do not judge people whose kids just can't seem to let it go. I would never just offer my opinion on someone else's blog/twitter/life...it's just that...my opinion. No one knows for sure what is best for someone else's child or family.

    Oh man, I need to stop now. You got me all kinds of riled up.

    Breathe....breathe....breathe...

    Okay. Thanks for posting this. Cheers to Motherhood and the awesome club that it is. Mwah!

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  12. I agree! Ugh all that *fighting* is the reason I don't go on Babycenter anymore! It got real old real quick! To each Mom their own :)

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  13. So true! I'm not a mom yet, but I do see a lot of mommy bashing by other moms. I think it's a time when you need each other, not a debate!

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  14. I think I understand how it happens -- as a parent, you research and decide what is best for your child, and genuinely think it is the best possible thing. I think its hard to distinguish between what is best only for your child and what is best for all children in general.

    That said, I think even if you have genuine concerns about a choice a parent has made, you have to know the parents' hearts and know they are doing what they believe is best. You also have to weigh if talking to the parents about their choice is helpful and supportive to them as parents (emphasis on supportive). If not, and it usually isn't, keep your mouth shut. That's my take at any rate.

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  15. Great post! I'm not a mother yet, but I've noticed how crazy people can get in arguing for their own opinions. You're so right...everyone is different, and you all know your babies best. I'm so glad someone addressed this, because even though I don't have kids yet, it bothers me the way people act sometimes!

    (I will have to remember this when I am a mom! ha! I hope I am able to not push my opinions on other people or act superior or feel inferior based on choices I make!)

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  16. I could have written this exact same post today .... I had a "conversation" with someone today (not another woman - a father, in fact) and I felt like I was being attacked because of my opinion on a certain part of pregnancy. And, well ... it sucked. Seriously? Why do we make each other feel like one way is okay and one way isn't??

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  17. ouuu can we add the awful competition for -- my baby did such and such by so many months, and rolled over at this age and crawled by that age and my baby weighed in the 98 percentile -- to the ban list of the motherhood alliance? i get bragging on baby's accomplishments, but sometimes it really just feels like some moms just want to out do the other moms. Every child's accomplishment is admirable and significant all by itself without comparison to others.

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