I don't know what it is, but lately, I am enjoying mommyhood even more than usual. There is so much life being brought to my heart over here, and it's so good.
My heart is just bursting with momma love. So much of it. It's no secret that I think my kid is amazing. I think that every parent, in their own right, find their children to be awesome. I am no different. But for some reason this week I've just slowed down more.
I notice everything. All her little quirks. Her little facial expressions. The number of times she says "thank you mommy" when I hand her a cracker or "oops, sorry momma" if she drops something. I've been noticing how the warmer, more humid-like weather makes her hair curl up even more. And how darn adorable it looks up in a single ponytail with her 'bangs' pinned back. How adorable her little white, pasty arms look in those sweet little tank tops. And how happy I am to see her little chubby toes hanging out of her sandals once again.
This year feels so much different than last. She was so fun last year, so fun. But this year is different. She's older, even more fun (which I never thought was possible), and everything just feels so NEW! and Exciting! And amazing! to her. I am finding myself so wrapped up in her every day little excitements that I, too, am feeling the same excitement. Over things I didn't know I ever cared about. You know?
Like yesterday afternoon, we were sitting on the deck in this nice, sunny, blissful March weather, blowing bubbles. We blew bubbles last year, but this year? It's so much cooler. So much more fun. She ran around the deck jumping up and down smacking her hands together yelling, "I CATCH IT!" over, and over and over again. You couldn't wipe the joy off her face if you tried. And you couldn't wipe it off mine, either.
It's those little things. And this week I've just had a lot of full-heart-mom moments.
Like watching my girl run a playground like she's done it forever. Sliding down every slide known to man, and always by herself like a big girl. Or getting along with her friends so well and making me proud that she cares so much at her young age about other little people. Or how she tickled her baby cousins belly and made little faces at him to get him to smile and laugh. How she learned to swing on the swings on her belly for the first time. Or how she cups her hand around her ear and says "what's that?" every time she hears an unfamiliar sound. Or how she'll spot every single bird "tweet-tweet" that's around. How she had her first experience with a "bug", and how dang sweet she was to that little gnat. Yes. A gnat. She cried when it flew away saying, "Bye bug" through tears.
I'm just in awe of this little person. She really is a gem. And yes, she can frustrate the daylights out of me some days, but this kid? Is my heart. She makes me so proud to be a mom. To be her mom.
I'm privileged to get this opportunity. Momming this baby girl. Making the decisions to have water ice for lunch one day because it's more fun. Being able to dress her in bright, funky colors because why the heck not? Getting to buy her that minnie mouse bookbag because her face lit up when she saw it. Getting her the ugly Dora shirt I swore I'd never all because it makes her happy and she did a little jig when she saw it at the store. Letting her have the last sips of my slushy because I love her that much. And being honored that she wants to wear her sunglasses in her hair "like mommy do".
Kids have a way of expanding and stretching your heart more than you ever knew possible. That's for sure.
And thank God for that. I need her just as much as she needs me.