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Monday, August 13, 2012

Real life?

Real life is settling in a bit.

I did it.

One whole week at home with two little girls who I'm responsible for. Today starts week 2. We have made it out the door for some outings. Little things. More so when Declan is home than anything else (hey, I need extra hands--I don't know how people do this alone yet).

The feelings of guilt that I blogged about regarding Emeline are starting to subside. Every day when I see the girls together it gets better, because I know what a gift Lucy is for Em, and vice versa. I'm so grateful that she is such a sweet big sister--that makes it so much easier. I also think my post-baby-hormones are settling down a bit and so there hasn't been much unnecessary tears from me. Aka: I'm not a blubbering mess anymore.

My outings last week alone with the kids were minimal. I think I probably only went out twice, once where I kept them strapped in the car (went to a drive-thru for lunch, fancy pants). The other, a "safe outing" to my parents house where I knew no one could get hit by a car or lost, and I could nurse simply whenever the little miss demanded needed. It worked, and it was fun for Emeline to get out--she loooves going over there.

We're doing what we can to keep life flowing as normal as possible for Eme. This week, we went to the park after dinner as a family. Daddy played hardcore with her, while I walked the baby around in a stroller and ooh'ed and ahh'ed at all the big girl stuff she could do. "Look MOMMY!!!" as she climbed things that I swear she shouldn't be able to climb and I got lumps in my throat.

Heck, we even managed to have dinner out as a family, at a restaurant (chili's), where we had a remotely peaceful meal. It was even topped off with a trip to Dairy Queen. See? We're doing it. We're doing this Parents of Two thing. Trying, anyway.

Declan and I are trying to be intentional about each getting some alone time, too. Time without kids, without each other, even--to do what we want for a few hours here and there, alone or with friends. Honestly? It's much needed for me when all week I've been in yoga pants, messy hair, adorned in spit-up, and talking about Dora the Explorer. An hour, even, of sanity-at my happy place (Target), makes all the difference.

So Friday night? For two+ hours, I walked around Target alone. Trying to find a few pieces of appropriate clothes that don't cling to my milk makers (I hate that part, seriously. I prefer my skinny barely-exist boobs). While that part wasn't fun, it was nice to just be at peace in my head, leave Declan with the babies (one was in bed), and feel semi-normal. I was feeling great until the lady at the checkout counter told me how tired I look, and I even put on makeup for the trip. I guess no amount of makeup can hide this kind of tired.

I fail.

The next day I even got out to a friends baby shower--but this time I took the littlest lady in my life with me. It was nice to get dressed up and feel kind of pretty. After I lose 20lbs I'll probably feel better, but I'm taking that part a day at a time (and it deserves a whole 'nother post--in a few weeks).

Don't worry, Declan got his turn to go out, too. He finally went and saw Dark Knight, which he's been dying to see. Of course, before he left he made sure to have Emeline bathed and in bed for me (isn't he sweet?)--but of course, since Daddy was away and mommy was alone, it resulted in a Failed Bedtime. Isn't that always the case? So I got some late night snuggles with both (!!!) my girls. Still crazy typing that. Girls. I have two girls.

We even took both girls to Church for the first time on Sunday morning.

Last night Declan and I decided to wait to make a nice dinner until after Emeline was in bed. It was just one of those nights, we needed the sanity, and the togetherness---and a peaceful dinner. So we fed her something else for dinner, got her ready for bed, and THEN we made an awesome steak dinner. Even Lucy (who has preferred to be worn like 99.9% of the time) slept in the swing during our meal. We had a little at-home-date and it was nice.

We took a few minutes to be like, Whoa, we have two kids. How are we doing with it all? We're good like that, we try to keep in check with our feelings and life transitions--and how can we do better-type thing. But really, all in all--we decided that it's going well. This two kids thing. A slow start? Yes. But a good one.

Me & my fluffy pink robe and yoga pants wouldn't have it any other way.

***

This weeks little goal will be to use my real camera to capture some moments. I mean, thanks Instagram for catching these moments---but I must be better with my good camera.

Bring it on.

20 comments:

  1. 2 does take a bit to get used to...but after a bit it will be no biggie and you will wonder what you did with only one :)

    I am ADDICTED to instagram...but totally agree...I need to bust out the real camera as well!!

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  2. Stupid Taget cashier! Telling someone they looks tired is just a nice way of saying you look like hell. People just need to keep their mouths shut! :)

    It sounds like you guys have really found your groove!

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  3. The alone time is so important. I mean Target is somehow so peaceful :)

    We do dinners after Mia goes to bed sometimes too. It's good us time!

    You're doing great! Keep your chin up. Seems to me your rockin' this new title!!!

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  4. It's great that your still making alone time for each other and yourselves. So glad it's been a good transition for everyone.

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  5. It sounds like you are doing so well with two littles in your life. You are so very encouraging to me. I want two kids, too, and they will be close in age by default of me waiting so long to try!

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  6. Your doing a great job momma! Love all the pics of Lucy on IG!!! ANd Eme too!

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  7. I'm impressed that you went to dinner as a family. My son is 3 months old and we have yet to go out to eat with all 4 of us. I think we need to do it soon though.

    I notice now that I have two that getting a break once in a while is a MUST whereas before it was nice but not necessary.

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  8. Sounds like an awesome weekend! I so need a trip out alone... and a date alone with the hubs. Love your sweet girls! Hope to see some more of your photography skills soon.

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  9. Sounds like things are going really well! Yay! I miss instagram. My phone died, darnit.

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  10. Sounds like you guys are doing great! And I love those at home dates after the kids are in bed. Your girls (!!) are adorable!

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  11. I'm really loving your posts about life with 2... it's helping my brain calm down A LOT. I'm taking tons of mental notes =)

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  12. We used to always eat after Connor was in bed. It makes it nice to feel like you are having a date night together, even if it is in your own home and dishes need to be done afterward. Keep up the good work!

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  13. You're doing amazing. Seriously, I'm in awe of you. You SO got this Mom of 2 thing, girl. :) xo

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  14. believe me when i say you are making this parents of 2 thing look easy!

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  15. So, I just noticed you're hangin' out on Pinterest... Totally in awe of your Mommy of Two Skills. I hope I can rock it this hard in November when Peyton gets her little sister :) You're awesome!

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  16. Dude. My BIGGEST fear is that Connor is going to get hit in a parking lot while I'm trying to get Cade out of the car, which is why I park right by a cart thingy and transport them directly into it! Either that or I make him hold into my leg until I can hold his hand. Gosh, we need more arms!!!

    One of my first outings when Cade was a wee little babe was to tj maxx and wouldn't you know he decided he had to eat!right!then! So I grabbed some clothes to "try on" and spent 30 minutes in te dressing room. Thank the sweet lord for technology because I don't know what I would have done if Connor didn't have my iPod to play on. It went well, but, whew! It drained me!!!

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  17. You are doing a fabulous job. The end.

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  18. You are completely rocking this Mom of two thing. You've got this :)

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  19. I think you're a rock star and I just hope I have it as together as you do when I have two!

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  20. This was nice to read (can you tell I'm catching up with you?) .... I'm glad to hear you're starting to settle. To be honest, i feel like I'm failing at the "real life" aspect of this 2 kids thing. Because of the move and everything, our normalcy is interuppted ... I have only ONCE gone somewhere (other than friends/family member's houses, church, dropping E at daycare of a drive through) with both kids. It was a quick trip to TRU. I haven't even grocery shopped with both. I know I NEED to in order to build my confidence. But, it's just so so scary. Ha.

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