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Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Not your average pre-thanksgiving post. Sigh.

I have to be honest---I am so overwhelmed today. I would love to ooze and write a thankful-grateful heart post...but I'm struggling. It's not that I'm not thankful, and grateful--I am. But my head is tired and just...like I said, generally I'm feeling overwhelmed today.

I can't even tell you how much I've had to rely on my family for last minute help with my kids the last few days. Part of it makes me feel so terribly guilty. Like, why I'm not yet super-mom status, feeling confident enough to drag two kids to the doctor at the same time. Part of me feels guilty---why should I get to run in a 5K with my husband. I should have just let him run the race and I stay back with the kids this time, rather than get help to watch them.

Every time I need to go into work to do something...again, it requires help with the kids. I just feel so bad, like I don't want to burn out people I love. But. Ugh.

Anyway. It's stupid. But yea. These are the things overwhelming me today.

I had to schedule a last minute doctors appointment for Emeline. I didn't think they'd get her in until maybe Friday--but upon explaining some things to them, they want to see her like, now. Until I know further details about what's going on, I don't really want to write about it. As far as I know it's not serious--but just keep us in your prayers.

I'm just feeling stupidly anxious about it. We're heading there soon.

My back is in killer-pain. And yet, I still want to run this 5K tomorrow morning even though I'll probably be hobbling like a 90 year old woman by the end.

The back pain though? It's really, really starting to bother me and make me unhappy.

I'm fully aware that the things I feel anxious about today are minimal. But for some reason, today, they don't feel that way.

For now, I'll look at these photos of my girls that make me laugh and smile...and remind me that IT'S OKAY. It is all okay. More than okay.


And tomorrow, I will stuff my face with turkey.

****

I hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving!

(also, if you didn't see my new blog design--get out of your reader and come check it out)

23 comments:

  1. I think all of us moms who work from home, often feel like we're supposed to take on everything! that we are ALWAYS supposed to have our kids. But, that's not possible all the time! I too, feel guilty when asking for help...but sometimes for everyones sanity, we have to! I don't take both kids with me anywhere alone, unless I absolutely have to. Why do that to ourselves if we don't have to? Try not to feel guilty!!! Hope everything is ok with Emeline! Happy Thanksgiving!

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  2. Breathe in, breathe out girl!! Hope you have an amazingly wonderful Thanksgiving, friend!!! Xoxo

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  3. Praying for sweet Emeline and peace for your Mama heart. Keep us posted.

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  4. You should try the chiropractor! Hope you run well and have a fanstastic Thanksgiving!

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  5. As moms it's hard for us to admit that sometimes we need help. And that's OK. I'm guilty of it too! But remember that moms need breaks now and again, and a little me time to do things for themselves. You run your heart out tomorrow and know that you're an excellent role model for the girls!

    Hope you get some peace of mind at the doctors today!

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  6. Thinking of you...ain't no shame in relying on family. You're so lucky to have awesome parents and a sister to help you out! And I'm sure it's not hard to want to watch your super cute girls :)

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  7. Ohmygosh those pics literally made me laugh out loud! We are certainly praying for Emeline and hoping that everything will be okay. I hope you're okay too and that this feeling will pass or resolve itself for you. Best of luck on your run tomorrow and that your back will allow you to finish.
    Happy Thanksgiving to you and your adorable family.

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  8. Happy thanksgiving! Momma guilt is a terrible monster huh! Have fun in the 5K and I'll be praying for your daughter!

    Love, Traci Michele @ Ordinary Inspirations


    http://www.ordinaryinspirations.blogspot.com

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  9. hope emeline is ok. hang in there. and it's ok to vent, sometimes that makes everything a little better too! happy thanksgiving!

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  10. Katie, I am a firm believer in chiropractics. I know not everyone is, but sounds like it would be worth a try. I've been going to one since I was 13 for a neck injury as well as a vertebrae issue I was born with, so it's been about 21ish years. Back pain is no fun and can ruin every.single.day.
    It IS all going to be okay. If you are worried about over-extending your families babysitting maybe see if there might be a college student home on break that you could call on during these last minute appointments. You just might regain some sanity :). Will pray for Emeline and for you!

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  11. I sometimes feel that way because of the help I get from some local family members ... but every single time I mention it, they reassure me that it is their pleasure to help with the kids. I am sure your parents feel teh same way. I'm praying for your back to feel better and praying for Eme, too. xox.

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  12. Hang in there!
    Love the glasses photos and blog makeover. So adorable.
    Happy Thanksgiving!!!!

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  13. Hang in there. Praying that everything works out for the girls and your race.

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  14. Sending hugs and prayers your way for the girls and race....hope your back feels better.

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  15. Wonder if the back pain has something to do with post parting stuff. I had terrible back pain after baby #2...about 3-4 months after I had him. I was in tears everytime I had to bend over to pick him up. It was no fun. I thought maybe it was from my new sneakers...or running...but I have heard of a couple other people around the same time after having a second child having bad back problems. I am happy to say that it'd much better now!

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  16. First, I LOVE the new blog design. That header is ADORABLE!

    Second, thanks for writing this post. I was actually thinking some very similar thoughts this morning, and it makes me feel less "scrooge"ish. :)

    Praying for little miss E!

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  17. so love the glasses on the girls. they are precious!!!! Hoping that Emeline is good and you really shouldn't let your back pain go. You are a good mama. Don't feel guilty for wanting to have your own time or do something with your hubby! Take care and happy thanksgiving to you and your family!

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  18. Every doctors appointment for Liam makes me anxious. Whether is a wellness check, extra blood tests, developmental exams, eye checks, hernia exams/operations, etc. I think...no I know it's just part of motherhood. These little ones are so much a part of us.

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  19. I'm so sorry about your back. I really hope the turkey trot goes better than expected and that you have a great day tomorrow, my friend. xo

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  20. I also have back pain and I did a little research on good ole dr. Google and apparently low estrogen can cause back pain and when you are nursing your estrogen is super low, so not really anything I can do about it right now. But I know what you mean, it's frustrating when your back hurts and it makes me grumpy.

    I also feel like a burden when I have to ask people to watch my kids. Do you know anyone that does daycare at home? At least then maybe the kiddos can go there when you have work stuff.

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  21. Don't discount your emotions. They are yours and they are real. I hate those days that I feel overwhelmed and can't seem to get rid of it. Just know that your blog followers (me included) are praying for a nice relaxing day for you today. And also for emeline. I hope you got some answers and peace in whatever it might be. I'm sure you are running right now, so here I am in TN cheering you on, Go Katie!!! :) have a happy thanksgiving!

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  22. I just started reading your blog and I know 100% how you feel. I have a two year old son. My mother passed away 4 years ago from breast cancer....so I have to depend entirely on my mother in law and good friend to help with him. He stays with a sitter sometimes when i have to work...but my husband and I sometimes have opposite work schedules when he's on graveyard and I'm a high school teacher and coach with lots of evening duties. I feel guilty ALL the time. And like a huge burden to everyone. I just wanted to say, you are not alone!

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