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Tuesday, July 16, 2013

a good one went home.

(declan's dad, Attila, holding Lucy for the first time)
The last few days have been a whirlwind in the worst way. My good-hearted, amazingly loving Father-in-law passed away Saturday morning in his home. It was the call you never want to receive, and I believe my pain is only a tiny fraction of the pain my husband, his siblings and his mom feel right now.

It's absolutely gut-wrenching. I think losing a parent at any age is awful, but my husband is 26. It seems unfair. And yet we all know that we were just blessed to know him & be loved by him for as long as we did.

Declan's Dad was a gentleman. He treated women with respect and kindness. He spent many years as the stay-at-home parent and Declan has fond, fond memories of having a lot of quality, one on one time with him. They fostered many children in their home, and he had the chance to show 26 children what a genuine Father's love looks like. He is gentle, slow to speak, quick to listen, and a damn good cook, too.

The lessons he taught my husband will never be forgotten and his amazing legacy of being an amazing daddy and husband is something I get to witness everyday through his son.

I feel blessed to have known him for as long as I did, and to have him as one of my 'parents' for the last 6 years. I feel blessed that he always accepted me with open arms into their family.  I feel blessed that he got to love on both my babies, and stare into their sweet, newborn faces within a few days of them being born. I feel blessed that I got to share in the experience of his amazing meals he so much loved cooking for his family. I feel blessed that I'd get to witness heartfelt conversations between him and Declan often. I feel blessed that I get to hold the sweet and genuine compliments he gave me close to my heart.

He will be sorely missed. And that barely scratches the surface.

This is a hard week. I think many facets of life just feel like a big blur right now. It is a big blur. It's hard to function normally when nothing is normal right now. Add in that both my girls are so sick right now (they have classic timing, always), it's just. Overwhelming.

Our family covets your prayers during this time. Prayers for my husband as he walks this walk of grief, his siblings, his sweet momma, his dad's only sister, and the grandbabies. Prayers for healing for the girls, too would be appreciated.

Thanks so much.


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60 comments:

  1. So sorry for your loss, prayers for all. Just recently lost a friend to cancer and found the book The Invisible String to send to her 3 year old daughter. All the reviews said it was a great book to help toddlers deal with loss.

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  2. Katie, I am so so sorry! I will remember you and your sweet family in my prayers this week!

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  3. Katie, I'm so sorry for your family's loss. My husband lost his father when he was 25 and like you said, it's not fair. I'll be praying for your husband...and you too. I know what it's like to watch someone you love so much hurt so badly and that feeling of helplessness because there's nothing you can do to fix this. Hugs.

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  4. Big prayers for you and your family. May God's peace wash over you all

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  5. My heart feels for you. I lost my dad when I was 20, but I never knew him as a father figure so I can only imagine how horribly painful it is. It just breaks my heart for Declan and for you too. I'll be praying for you.

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  6. Sending thoughts and prayers your way!! So sorry for your loss

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  7. I just can't imagine. I'm so sorry for your loss-and I know that means nothing/you're hearing that all day long. We will be praying for your entire family!

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  8. I just can't imagine. I'm so sorry for your loss-and I know that means nothing/you're hearing that all day long. We will be praying for your entire family!

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  9. I am SO sorry for your loss. He sounds like a truly wonderful man who made so many people that much better just by knowing him. You and your family are most definitely in my thoughts and prayers.

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  10. I am so very sorry for your family's immense loss. My husband's father passed away quite unexpectedly just over 3 years ago and it left a huge hole in our hearts. Your father in law sounds like he was one of the most incredibly kind-hearted men who has ever graced the Earth. What an amazing gift to know his legacy is being carried on by your husband, so that your girls will always feel his love and grace.
    Prayers for your family!

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  11. I am so very sorry for your family's immense loss. My husband's father passed away quite unexpectedly just over 3 years ago and it left a huge hole in our hearts. Your father in law sounds like he was one of the most incredibly kind-hearted men who has ever graced the Earth. What an amazing gift to know his legacy is being carried on by your husband, so that your girls will always feel his love and grace.
    Prayers for your family!

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  12. I'm so sorry for the loss. My heart goes out to each of you. My husband lost his mom suddenly 4 years ago and there simply are no words. Prayers for peace and comfort at this time.

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  13. We have a loss of a grandparent in our family this week and I thought that was hard. I can't imagine it being a parent. Thoughts and prayers with you and your husband and family.

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  14. I'm so sorry for you, Declan, and Lyrn's loss :( Losing a parent is hard no matter how old you are and I'm so happy you have so many amazing memories to share with your children. Thinking of you all, xoxo.

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  15. I'm so very sorry for your family's loss. Prayers and thoughts are with you during this time.

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  16. I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending prayers and love during this difficult time.

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  17. Oh Katie, My heart is broken for you, Declan and all of the family. I will definitely be praying for the girls to feel better and for our Heavenly Father to be ever so near to you all right now. Big hugs!

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  18. I was 26 when I lost my Dad last summer to cancer. Definitely not something you expect to happen. I'm sorry for your loss and will keep your family in my thoughts.

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  19. I'm sorry for your loss. My grandmother died when my Mom was only 26. I can't imagine going through something like that. Thinking of all of you!

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  20. So sorry. Prayers and love to you and your family during this difficult time.

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  21. I am so sorry for your families loss. I sat here in tears reading this because not long ago my ex husband lost his father and I have yet to blog about it because I dont know the words to say.

    You are so strong, such an amazing mommy and wife. I can't believe that your hubby is only 26. I said it on instagram earlier today but I look up to your relationship in so many ways and though this is such a hard hard time I know it will bring you guys closer.

    Stay strong, get your babes healthy and cherish all those memories of your father in law!

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  22. I'm sorry, again, to hear about this.

    I love that he was the stay-at-home parent, and that they did foster care! My parents, too, did foster care, and I believe it truly takes special people to take on such a responsibility. It's so special. 26 children!

    Been praying for comfort & healing.

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  23. I'm so sorry! He sounds like an amazing man. Our pastor once said its ok to cry because you miss someone but don't feel sad for them. They are in HEAVEN! He is doing good. He has no pain or sadness. He is with Jesus! Praying for healing for your girls' illness and their broken hearts. My friend recently lost her father in law and her sweet son was very close to him. I think she told him he can still see him in his dreams and he has had dreams about him. They have visited his grave a few times too. You all have another guardian angel. Covering you all in prayers.

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  24. Sending prayers your way....so sorry for your loss.

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  25. So sorry for your families loss!! My prayers are with you all during this time, and for your sweet girls to feel better soon!!! I will also say a special prayer for you to have the strength to get through all of this and be everything you need to be for your little family!!

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  26. I am so very sorry for your loss. Praying for Declan, his family, you and the girls. hopefully they get to feeling better too. xxoo

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  27. I'll be praying for you all. Having just been through this in March, I'm here if you need anything

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  28. Oh my heart aches for your family. Sending hugs, prayers and lots of healthy vibes your way.

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  29. God bless the baby..
    Keep in touch,
    www.beingbeautifulandpretty.com

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  30. Hugs, love and prayers for your family. I'm sorry for your loss.

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  31. He sounds like an amazing man. I'm so sorry!

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  32. Oh Katie..
    I'm so sorry for your loss as well as your husband's family. I lost my dad 10 years ago and it hurts, I will not lie about this emotion.

    Don't try to dwell on his passing but on the gifts he gave you, your husband and your girls. Please take the time to take care of yourself and your family.

    Lots of love and hugs from someone whose been there.
    Kelly

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  33. I'm so sorry for your family's loss. I hope the girls get well soon.

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  34. My heart aches for him and his family. Losing a parent is so incredibly tough. I'm praying for all of you.

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  35. I am so sorry for your family's loss. He sounds like a wonderful man. Praying for you and your family.

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  36. Sending many prayers to your sweet family. I don't even want to know what it feels like to lose a parent and I feel so horrible for your husband. I am glad, however, that he can take some comfort in the fact that he knows where his father is. May God bless you all during this difficult time.

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  37. I'm truly sorry for your loss losing a parent when you're young sucks with a capital S. My prayers are with you all.

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  38. I am so sorry, Katie! Praying for you, your husband and his family. I love my father-in-law, and would be devastated to lose him. HUGS!

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  39. My heart truly goes out to your family during this difficult time. Your words are an excellent tribute to what sounds like an amazing man. {{{Hugs}}}

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  40. I have been praying for you all during my prayer times, but I've noticed that God has really put you all on my heart during such random times. I hope you guys can feel them. XO

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  41. oh Katie, I am so so sorry for your loss. Please pass on my condolences to Declan too xxxxx

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  42. I am so sorry for your loss. I am praying for you and your family in this difficult time.

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  43. I'm so sorry for your family's loss. He sounds like an amazing man. Praying without ceasing for you all.

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  44. Absolutely praying! I'm so sorry for your loss Katie - will be thinking of you, Declan, and the whole family in these next few weeks!

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  45. Really sorry for your family's loss. This time will likely remain a blur in your memory. It is astute to recognize it as a blur in the present moment. My dad died when I was 14. It does get easier as the years go by,, but that feeling of missing him never goes away. Your husband is lucky to have such a thoughtful wife supporting him in this time.
    You'll be in my prayers.
    -Lauren

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  46. Keeping your family in my thoughts and prayers. So sorry for your loss, friend. Please let me know if there's anything I can do!

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  47. I am so very sorry to read of your loss...I know there are no words right now that will make anything easier but your family is in my thoughts and prayers. He sounds like a truly wonderful man that this world was lucky to have. I know hes in a special place watching over you guys.

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  48. Sorry for your loss! Praying!

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  49. My thoughts & prayers are with you & your family. My husband lost his father last month, and they weren't close, but it's just such a giant loss, losing a parent. Sending love to you both!

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  50. So sorry for your loss, Katie. Sending prayers out to you and your family. Love.

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  51. I am so sorry for your family's loss. I will be praying for you all. He sounds like he was an amazing man who will be greatly missed and fondly remembered.

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  52. I am so very sorry for your loss. Prayers go out to you and all the family, especially your husband.
    xoxo

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  53. The picture you posted is incredible and a blessing within itself. Your family is in my prayers.

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  54. Praying for you and your family. Sorry for your loss <3
    My 2 owls

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  55. Sending my prayers to your entire family!

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  56. Praying for yours and Declan's family and you all for peace and comfort. I'm so sorry Katie.

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